World Marriage Day is celebrated on the second Sunday of February each year. In 2025, it falls on Sunday 9 February.
Initially established by the American organization Worldwide Marriage Encounter, the day was officially blessed by Pope John Paul II in 1993, and celebrations have since expanded globally, transcending religious boundaries. It aims to honor the foundational role of husbands and wives in families and society, emphasising values such as faithfulness, sacrifice, and joy in daily life.
We have gathered several reflections from couples within the Diocese at various stages of marriage, from the newly engaged to those celebrating over 60 years together. Through their testimonies and advice, we hope to offer insight into both the joys and challenges of married life, providing wisdom, encouragement, and inspiration for couples at every stage of their journey.
The Season of Engagement: Love, Growth, and Commitment
When I thought of getting engaged, I only really pictured the proposal and the wedding planning. However, my 18-month-long engagement is teaching me that this time is so much more.
In some ways, it’s like Lent—you are saving and sacrificing time and resources in preparation for a big wedding day. You are waiting, waiting, waiting. Saving, saving, saving. Waiting to be with each other, live with each other, start a family, and call each other Mr. and Mrs.! You also grieve your old life and any other future possibilities or paths your life could have taken.
In other ways, it’s like spring—a season of witnessing new growth every day. The vision of your future… beautiful, blossoming potential… bursting into existence. It’s incredibly exciting to imagine a life together, and I am all aflutter, telling anybody and everybody about the shiny rock on my finger and how we are so meant to be together.
Then there are the terrifying days. The pressure of thinking about the wedding day, trying to look the best you ever have in your life, while others make judgments on whether you’ll “make it or not.” The moments of cold feet, facing the reality of the massive commitment you are about to undertake. There aren’t many times in life when you make a choice that is truly for life—‘til death do us part.’ I have even questioned, What is the point of marriage in our modern society?
Then there’s the happiness guilt—when others around you are breaking up, single, or dealing with partners who want different things. And there are days when I feel crazy. I’ve never been such a jealous person in my life. They say love makes you crazy—well, now that I know it’s finally happening, I don’t want to lose it! I also get very feminist angry that there’s a term for bridezilla but not one for groomzilla. And then I question myself: I’m getting everything I ever wanted… so why is that so scary?
When I remind myself that I’m preparing for a marriage and not just a wedding day, I feel grateful for the premarital courses my fiancé and I are enjoying. This is probably the most professional investment we’ve put into our relationship, and we pray it puts us in good stead. It’s worthwhile, and I recommend it to everyone. My fiancé isn’t Catholic, but it has still affirmed our commitment to each other.
My favorite lesson so far is this: when we argue, there are always two things at stake—the issue and the relationship. You can push to win the issue, but at the cost of the relationship.
A friend once told me to enjoy my engagement because, before marriage, you run to each other to confide in one another about your stressors and share your day. However, once married, your partner may be your stressor—or you may have already shared your day physically with them and have nothing left to say.
Another friend told me that now is the time to really test our relationship—our last chance to make sure he’s right for me. In fact, engagement is a time when I’ve been getting a lot of advice. I think that’s because people like happy endings. They want to believe in love stories. They want us to succeed. That’s very encouraging.
Today, I’m in a yell-it-from-the-rooftops-I’m-finally-getting-married! kind of mood. Both our parents have been together for 30+ years, and they literally fight like old married couples. While we swear we won’t be the same, we also hope we will be—committed, still together, and still mad (about each other, with each other!).
Penelope Van Der Lee
Catholic Parish of New Plymouth
A Lifelong Journey, Not Just a Day
Marriage is not to be taken lightly; it is a vocation that must be entered into with the understanding that it is forever. Without that foundation, when the storms come (and they will), you may struggle to trust that your marriage is a secure ship capable of weathering them. This uncertainty can make challenges feel even worse than they truly are—but all storms will pass.
We’ve been married for over seven years and have welcomed four children in that time. We’ve learned that during the busy years of raising a young family, it’s easy to lose focus on each other. There’s no way around that reality, but don’t forget to appreciate the small moments of calm that arise unexpectedly. Use those moments to cherish each other and to reflect on the blessings God has given you.
Some countercultural advice for those preparing for a wedding: don’t enter marriage in debt. Be content with the wedding you can afford, and keep it low-stress. The best man’s speech should focus on the relationship, not just be a rehash of your 21st. Remember, you are not the first people in the world to get married, and you won’t be the last—so consider your guests as well. Avoid placing unnecessary travel burdens on many of them.
For those considering marriage, take your time to reflect and don’t rush. We did an Engaged Encounter through the Wellington Diocese, and that focussed time of preparation was invaluable.
Richard & Mara Law
St Brigid’s Parish Pahiatua
Built on Faith: 60 Years of Marriage
Robert and Marie Keegan recently celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary, marking six decades of love, faith, and commitment. Married on 13 June 1964 at the Immaculate Conception parish in Stratford, their life together has been built on the values they embraced from the very beginning. They believe that a strong marriage is not just about love but also about faith, sharing, understanding, loyalty, and forgiveness—principles that have guided them throughout their journey.
Marriage, they say, is intended to bring a couple together in a beautiful life union, where they care for each other until death parts them. If a couple has deep love for one another, this will lead to a lifelong partnership. Love is at the heart of marriage, yet it is delicate and must be nurtured daily. In today’s world, many things can interfere with a relationship, sometimes causing damage that is difficult to repair. That is why love needs constant care—through daily affirmations, hugs, cuddles, kisses, and kind words that strengthen the bond between husband and wife.
Faith has also played an essential role in their marriage. Their trust in each other is strengthened by their shared faith in the Holy Catholic Church and the sacrament of marriage. Sharing, too, is vital—selfishness can lead to unhappiness and even the breakdown of a marriage. Once sharing is lost, it can be difficult to rebuild trust, so it must remain a priority.
Understanding each other is not always easy, as emotions and deeper struggles are not always visible. It takes patience and special attention to truly recognise what the real issue is before deciding how to move forward together. Loyalty is another cornerstone of a lasting marriage—remaining completely devoted to one another, through every challenge and every joy, until the very end. And when conflict arises, forgiveness is key. Resolving disagreements with a willingness to truly forgive allows love to endure, rather than letting resentment take hold.
Robert and Marie’s marriage has been shaped by these principles, which they have practised throughout their 60 years together. It is a formula that has worked for them—a testament to the strength of faith, love, and the daily choice to walk through life together, hand in hand.